Words/Phrases I Need to Officially Ban from Controversial Facebook Threads

I think we can all agree public discourse has been a little edgy on social media these days. As much as I try to stay away from the insanity, sometimes I get sucked right in and before I know it, I'm stumbling down a rabbit hole filled with all of humanity's worst qualities.

Yet, as I'm stumbling, I can't help but notice certain phrases and terms used over and over and at this point I just need it to stop immediately. So, I've compiled a list I need banned, the sooner the better. Obviously no one cares about what I think, so this exercise if futile, but I must get this off my chest regardless.



We get it. You don’t like liberals. However, your continued use of this phrase makes me immediately envision Larry the Cable Guy except less teeth. Not the best look.



Really? I mean, really? Just stop. 


Killary, Trumptards, Obummer, etc. 

If you and I disagree on a policy issue, and during our discussion you use one of these derogatory nicknames, I’m leaving the conversation because you have the maturity of a 10 year old. Nothing personal, I just value my time.


Do your research

If one more person who got their online degree at Google University tells someone to “do their research” my brain is going to explode. If you want to truly “do your research” I recommend learning how to read and interpret actual studies. Reading a biased blog and allowing them to interpret it for you IS HOW WE GOT INTO THIS MESS. Thank you.


If your kid is vaccinated, why are you so afraid of my unvaccinated kid?

The pro-vaccination crowd has explained this to ad nauseam. It’s called herd immunity. If you haven’t had this explained to you yet, you’re so late to the game you might as well ask me if I know that Ross and Rachel got back together. (PS - if you want to debate the science on herd immunity, fine - that's for another thread. Just stop asking the question everyone already knows the answer to, I beg you.)


Your an idiot

It’s some kind of beautiful poetic justice that 90% of the people who call a stranger an idiot online use poor grammar while doing so. Okay, I won’t ban this. Please keep doing it.


Anyone who disagrees with my overgeneralized talking points is a bigot/racist/homophobe/xenophobe or is lazy/entitled/spoiled/stupid/freeloader

True, some people who disagree with you are. That’s just a statistical inevitability. But not everyone. Some people just have concerns about a certain policy and how it will play out and affect their lives or our nation’s debt. Can we converse like grown-ups please? Because not everyone who is concerned about how we can afford a new entitlement program is a bigot and not everyone who thinks we need to do more with our programs wants to stay home and suckle the government’s teet.


Get a job

So wanting better for those less fortunate now makes one joyfully unemployed? Okay, good one, chief.


I’m just here for the comments (with a meme, usually Michael Jackson eating popcorn)

I’ll admit, this is pretty funny - well - it was really funny 5 years ago. The joke is done now, let’s try something new. Thank you.


Wake up sheeple!

I would bet my Lush bath bombs that no one has ever "woken up" and suddenly seen the light from a conspiracy theorist in a Facebook comment thread. And I love my freaking bath bombs, so you know I'm pretty confident about this. If you want everyone to roll their eyes, say this. If not, avoid it.


These are the most important things I need banned now. Spread the word. I'm sure I'll come up with more later. I'll keep you posted.