Overcoming My Fear (Of Lyle Lovett)

I've always thought I wasn't the type to freak out when I came across a celebrity. That while everyone else was screaming for autographs and pictures, I would be so incredibly calm and nonchalant that they would actually approach ME and offer to sign my bra. Apparently, that is not the case.

I was recently on a flight to Houston when the lady next to me leaned in close, flashed me a crazy smile and whispered, "Lyle Lovett is on the plane!" She noticed him sitting in first class and he was kind enough to get a picture with her before the plane took off. I don't know much about Lyle Lovett other than he's a singer that was married to Julia Roberts for, like, ten minutes, but that's enough to make him a celebrity in my eyes and leave me a little star-struck.

The only other time I came across a celebrity was about twenty years ago on a trip to D.C, but I'm not sure if Newt Gingrich counts as a "celebrity." He was never married to Julia Roberts, so we'll say no.

I knew nobody would believe he was actually on my plane if I didn't have proof and, since they don't let people who sit by the bathroom anywhere near first class, I asked the lady next to me the simple question of, "Can I take a picture of your picture?" It was awkward but she agreed. And that's where this came from.


Fast forward four hours and two minutes later, as I'm making my way through the Houston airport towards baggage claim - behold! Lyle Lovett was getting his shoes shined! I stopped dead in my tracks, looked at him for one second longer than creepy, then kept on walking.

What are you DOING? This is Lyle Lovett! How many times will you run into a celebrity in your lifetime?

::starts walking back towards Lyle::

OMG!! What are you DOING? You can't walk up to him. Leave the poor man alone!

::walks away from Lyle::

Wuss! Turn around and go ask him if he'll take a picture with you!

::walks back to Lyle::

What is wrong with you?! Just let the man get his shoes shined without being bothered!

::walks away from Lyle::

You.are.such.a.dork. Turn your butt around and get a picture with him!

::walks towards Lyle::

I can't! I can't! I can't! I can't! I can't! I can't! I can't! I can't!

::walks away from Lyle::

By the way, while I'm having this inner dialogue and pacing the airport, there was a small crowd gathering near a sandwich stand, just watching me. I'm sure they were on pins and needles waiting to see what I would do. Maybe they'll make a movie about my inner struggle at the airport. I wonder if they could get Angelina Jolie to play me?  

Anyway, I got about twenty steps when I stopped in my tracks, took a deep breath and said, "It's now or never."

I was trying to psych myself up, kinda like a fighter in a ring at the UFC would start running in circles, screaming into the crowd, and punching at the air like a madman. Okay,I wasn't that bad. I just jumped a few times, breathed in and out like my baby was crowning, and then forced my body to turn around and face my fear.

Wearing yoga pants, yesterday's makeup, and the smile of a crazy person, I walked right up to Lyle Lovett and asked, "Hi. Can I get a picture with you?"

I am happy to announce that he was a perfect gentleman and was very kind. He asked me my name and then what my plans were in Houston before taking this frame-able piece of art with me.

Does he look a little scared to you?

I walked away with a big goofy grin on my face - and a few high fives from the people at the sandwich stand.

I met my first celebrity (Gingrich doesn't count) and overcame my fear. Now if I can just kill a spider without using an entire roll of paper towels then I'll be unstoppable!