Conversations with My Husband: Thanksgiving Pie Wars

Husband: You're making me pecan pie for Thanksgiving, right?

Me: Oh, um, eeeeee. I don't know babe. There will be tons of food at our family's Thanksgiving. I think my sister is making apple, I'm making a pumpkin cheesecake and my mom is making regular pumpkin.

Husband: Whaaaat? That's my favorite pie! You're not going to make it for me this year?

Me: Well, I mean, I'm already making so much food. No one really likes it - it's like a corn syrup jelly with pecans on it, you know? Just a little overkill, right?

Husband: What are you talking about? Your mom loves it and you eat it all the time. Actually you eat so much of it when we have it, I get that panicky feeling like I can't trust you alone with it.

Me: Like you with my KIND bars? *opens drawer* Holy crap, you ate all of my KIND bars!

Husband: Slight difference - I actually like the KIND bars. You're eating my pie and disparaging it at the same time. That's messed up.

Me: You don't have to like a pie, to like eating it. Everybody knows that.

Husband: What?

Me:  The day after Thanksgiving I'm going through major binging withdrawals. Is pecan pie my first choice for breakfast? No. But it's there. Sitting in a delicious pie crust. Filled with a goo that tastes like a sugar bomb. So am I eating it? Yes. Probably with left over Redi Whip. But I'm not necessarily that happy about it. Well, I guess I'm kind of happy about it in the moment - whatever, you get my point.

Husband: Why don't you just bring home some leftover desserts from our family dinner so you can eat what you actually like and back up off my pecan pie?!

Me: Oh no, I'll enjoy treats during Thanksgiving and then that's it. I can't have my favorite desserts in the house, I'll eat it.

Husband: *blink* *blink*

Me: I'll just buy you a pecan pie.

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