Conversations with My Husband: Pregnacy Brain Gone Wrong

Just a little grocery shopping ...

Me: Wait. Why am I in this aisle?

Husband: I have no idea. I'm just the guy with the cart following the crazy lady with curls.

Me: I needed something for one of the dinners this week. What was it?

Husband: I don't know, olives?

Me:  Olives? Out of all the things to guess I needed for dinner, you picked olives?

Husband: Well, we're standing next to a wall of olives ... so ...

​​Me: Hold on, I have to pee again.

Husband: Am I just waiting here?

Me:  Yeah, just stay there, I'll be right back!

5 minutes ...

Husband: Is this real life?

Me: Oh my gosh, sorry. I have pregnancy brain like whoa.

Husband: Please don't say "like whoa" ever again. You're in your 30s and you're carrying my child.

Me: Isn't that what all the cool kids are saying?

Husband: Yes, that's why I need you to stop.

Me: Ok, well - let's get stuff for the baked beans I'm making for the fourth and then get the hell outta here.

::stares blankly at the baked beans::

Husband: What's the problem?

Me: I'm doubling the recipe, so I need 32 oz times 2 ... so ... that would be ...

Husband: 64! Am I on candid camera? 

Me: I know it's 64, THANKS. But the biggest can is 28 oz ... so ...

Husband: Get two big cans and an 8 oz can. You're starting to scare me.

Me:  I was getting there, ok?! You don't know what it's like having a baby steal all your blood making your brain shut down.

Husband: I don't think that's how pregnancy brain works. 

Me: So you're an OB now?

Husband: Alright, this is escalating. What else do you need?

Me: Do you think it would be disrespectful if I asked to use a motorized cart?

Husband: You do not need a motorized cart!

Me: Babe, I'm so freaking tired - we ran too many errands this morning. Can you carry me then?

Husband: Like Scarlett O'Hara?

Me:  You have to admit, that's a pretty good visual.

Husband: No.​​

If we sound a lot like you and your partner, give us a like on that Facebook button below so we don't feel so weird ... :D 

Oh, and share your story in the comments!