After watching a TV show where the couple has a celebrity "cheat" list, this unfortunate conversation begins:
Me: You know babe, I don't think I've ever asked you this - who's on your celebrity crush list?
Husband: That's a terrible question, I'm not answering it.
Me: Why not? What's the big deal? You know I would run away with Justin Timberlake in a hot second if he asked.
Husband: WHAT? Excuse me, I didn't know that! You'd cheat on me with Justin Timberlake?!
Me: Well. I mean. No. Not in real life.
Husband: Oh, ok. So what then - in your dreams?
Husband: Great. Why, because he's hot? Because he's an incredible singer and dancer? Because he's funny with a great personality?
Me: Do we share the same celebrity crush? Because you nailed it.
Husband: I don't like this conversation.
Me: Oh, please! It's just a silly question. I seriously have no idea what celebs you even find attractive - that seems kind of weird. You would think I would have some ide ...
Husband: Zoey Deschanel.
Me: WHAT. That bitch? She doesn't even have curly hair!
Me: I thought one of the things you found most attractive about me was my hair?
Husband: Well, I guess she's an exception.
Me: OH. REALLY.
Husband: I told you that was a terrible question.
Me: Ugh. I'd rather it was Sofia Vergara or something. I feel like you secretly want my sister.
Husband: Really? You feel like Zoey Deschanel is your sister?
Me: For your information, if she knew I existed, we'd be soul sisters.
Husband: Well, your soul sister is hot.
Me: Yep, this was a terrible question. I'm leaving.
Husband: *Sings Justin Timberlake's "Cry Me a River" as I walk away.*
Me: You better hope JT doesn't ever find me and fall in love with me because I'll be REAL torn.
Husband: I'll try not to worry!