Anti-Starbucks Man Becomes Defensive After Realizing Snowflakes aren’t Christian Symbols

LAKESTOWN, KY - 

A Lakestown Kentucky man became defensive and agitated on his Facebook status update after realizing snowflakes aren’t Christian symbols. 

Last week, Charles Morgan, 38, took to his Facebook profile to accuse Starbucks of being “too PC” and “anti-Christian” after getting his skinny morning latte, no whip and noticing the famous “red cup” was just “red.” The popular coffee chain had just debuted a new, plain red cup for the holiday season. In previous years, the cups sported snow flakes, snowmen and scarves.

A Starbucks barista, Trish Beard, 18, said she served Morgan who quickly became irate when she handed him his cup of coffee. “He stared at the red cup and just said, ‘What is this? What the hell is this?” said Beard. “I was like, ‘Uhhh, a red coffee cup?'”

Beard said Morgan stormed out of the Starbucks shortly after yelling, “This is last time you people take the Christ out of Starbucks! I’d throw this away if I wasn’t sleepy as hell!”

It’s reported Morgan went straight to work where he unloaded an angry rant on his Facebook.

A friend of Morgan's, Curt Benson, responded to the status update pointing out Starbucks used popular secular symbols of winter and holiday and never used Christian symbols on their cups. Morgan became defensive and responded with several middle finger emojis. This type of response is often used when someone realizes they're wrong so starts using douche like tactics as a distraction. Morgan unfriended Benson shortly after.

In response to this debacle, a local Christian woman said she couldn't care less Starbucks changed their cups. "What? Is this a thing? Like, people are actually pissed secular winter symbols are removed from a cup? There are children starving in this world! There's a refugee crisis! Feed the hungry and shut up!" 

Starbucks has come forward, confirming the plain red cup is simply a stylistic choice.

Charles Morgan could not be reached for comment.

 

This post is satire.